Life Lessons

As my most recent effort at a meaningful, lengthy relationship crashed and burned in the last couple weeks, it dawned on me that I've been dating for more than two decades at this point. Twenty years. 7000 days. That's a hella long time. I suppose I do have some understanding (and even expertise, ugh) of how this relationship thing works out, whether talking weeks, months or years at this ... read more

When I was 25 and working at Oppenheimer, my first job on Wall Street, I saw an article about a Reebok 4-minute mile challenge. That is, if you were an amateur athlete and could break a four-minute mile, Reebok would give you a million bucks. Or maybe it was $100,000, whatever. I used to work out hours a day, every day and since I'd ended my streak of playing hoops every single day for more than ... read more

What's up with the lies? Don't get me wrong, I'm no saint, you know? But there's something about these women I've dated lately and this incessant need to create a facade from the beginning. There was the vegan health nut who drank too much, who after checking her gmail at my house on a Saturday had left the window open. She canceled meeting me to see a friend sing at church the next morning ... read more

Rita: [Phil has described several people in the diner] What about me, Phil? Do you know me too? Phil: I know all about you. You like producing, but you hope for more than Channel 9 Pittsburgh. Rita: Well, everyone knows that! Phil: You like boats, but not the ocean. You go to a lake in the summer with your family up in the mountains. There's a long wooden dock and a boathouse with boards missing ... read more

The other night I'm at a charity event with a friend. After the event, we're in a car service headed downtown for drinks. She's got two Blackberries (Blackberrys?) out and is tapping away. After a couple minutes, I ask who's she's texting. She names a hook up friend of hers, and adds that she'd just texted her parents too. I feel the Negativity well up inside of me and I sit there putting ... read more

Forsake not an old friend; for the new is not comparable to him: a new friend is as new wine; when it is old, thou shalt drink it with pleasure.  -  Ecclesiasticus (ch. IX, v. 10) My mom used to tell me all the time that one of my best talents is surrounding myself with good people.  I look at my career today, the people I work with and more importantly who mentor me, and I'm proud to say ... read more

One of my favorite Thoreau quotes is "As if you can kill time without injuring eternity". I quote it often, and in my most recent relationship, I had quoted it in a discussion about why nothing good can come when you're out after about 1am or so. I'd used the Thoreau's wise words to underscore a bigger point as I often think of it in my own head, and that is that you've got to keep hard at it ... read more

People tell us that we play too loud But they don't know what our music's about We never listen to the record company man They try to change us and ruin our band. That's why we don't wanna be good That's why we don't wanna be good We're prisoners of rock and roll. When were jammin' in our old garage The girls come over and it sure gets hot We don't wanna be watered down Takin' orders from ... read more

People tell us that we play too loud But they don’t know what our music’s about We never listen to the record company man They try to change us and ruin our band. That’s why we don’t wanna be good That’s why we don’t wanna be good We’re prisoners of rock and roll. When were jammin’ in our old garage The girls come over and it sure gets hot We don’t wanna be watered ... read more

I'd contemplated whether to publish this Personal Story one.  It's an email I'd sent to a buddy of mine in heartpain.  It is what it is. I'm off to a business dinner for now.  Catcha manana. It is the duty of men to judge men only by their actions. Our faculties furnish us with no means of arriving at the motive, the character, the secret self.  (sermon, October 15, 1826)  - ... read more