June 9, 2008 12:04PM

I Still Hate Carrie Bradshaw and Someday When All These Women Have Bad Backs You Will Too

By Cody Willard

I know that I basically ticked off just about every urbanite single woman on the planet when I started my anti- “Sex in the City” (or “Sex And the City”…whatever) rants a few weeks ago.

To reiterate my rant’s main point — urban single women take the fantasies put forth on this TV show and think that they somehow should base their own lives and base the rationalizations of their own lives’ actions on it.

In Style’s Katrina Szish and many other urban women let me know that they think I’ve got it backwards…that the show’s successful because it’s based on the actual lives of urban single women.

Fact is, it’s impossible to tell what’s based on what at this point because the show itself has become such a full-on ingrained part of our culture. But when everybody tells you that “Everybody’s got a Miranda and a Samantha in their life”, somebody’s gotten confused about reality and fantasy.

I gotta tell you guys though, that after seeing the endless parade of stilettos running around Soho this weekend, I’m more convinced than ever that Sex and the City and the drunken, loose, high-fashion times that it showcases is the chicken to the egg that’s causing a lot of the drunken, loose, high-fashion times that so many urban single women are choosing to live.

Don’t get me wrong — I tend to like the way a woman looks when she walks around with her heel up propped four inches off the ground. But I recall many a women lamenting to me over the years about how the most unrealistic aspect of Sex and The City is how Carrie’s always walking and running around the city for hours on end in her four inch stilettos…

But sure enough, the vast majority of women walking and running around Soho for hours on this weekend were choosing to do so in their four inch stilettos.

The worst part is that you just know that someday in a couple decades when all the back problems from running around in stiletto heels for hours on end for years are coming home to roost that some celebrity is gonna go testify in front of Congress asking for billions of tax dollars from us responsible sneaker-wearers to help fund research for people with back problems from running around in stiletto heels for hours on end for years.

21 Responses to “I Still Hate Carrie Bradshaw and Someday When All These Women Have Bad Backs You Will Too”

Comment by Samantha

June 9th, 2008 at 1:48 pm

Mr. Willard,

It seems to me that you have some kind of personal issues with the show that go beyond the impact it has made on its viewers. It’s just a show, nothing more. Yes woman fell in love with it, and yes they may have taken some fashion tips from the ladies on the show but I don’t think anyone out there is making irrational decisions about serious matters in their lives like you seem to think. To me it just seems like any other trend, when a new style comes out everyone seems to follow. I wouldn’t really expect you to understand why the show is so popular but women really relate to it, just like you might relate to the men that host shows on ESPN or whatever your hobby might be.
Oh….and the back problem thing is just a little bit ridiculous.
Comment by Justin

June 9th, 2008 at 2:38 pm

Heels are great on special occasions and can enhance the dress of any woman, but wearing them daily is a major turn off. 4+ inch heels give off a entitled queen/stripper/porn star vibe. Add in a tramp stamp, and I wont be talking to you no matter how smart, beautiful, and engaging you are.

For any ladies reading this, there is nothing attractive about living your life according to Cosmo/Sex and the City standards. I’m not saying to be a complete prude, but be your own woman. Set yourselves apart from the millions already living the Carrie Bradshaw lifestyle. Girls are a dime a dozen, but a true woman can stop a man in his tracks.
Comment by Vik

June 9th, 2008 at 2:42 pm

WOW….Somebody is really mad about a SHOW!!!…THis is a great Show and an even better movie. Why are you taking it sooo seriously? This show/movie is obviously not one of your favorites…so stop watching it and MOVE ON!
Comment by Serena

June 9th, 2008 at 3:02 pm

Hmm…I don’t know what’s more ridiculous, your idiotic assessment of why SATC connects with the female cultural pulse or your picture. This article not only insults the intelligence of the female fans of the show, but, also, unfailingly highlights the insidious sexism that this movie’s release has unearthed. You have about as much qualification to comment on the effect of SATC on urban women’s “fantasies” as I do on the effectiveness of jock straps. I hope one of the silly urban women you rant about steps on your cave-man foot with her four-inch heels.
Comment by David

June 9th, 2008 at 3:13 pm

He has a point, I live in NYC - and there are legions of these trampy girls, as well as some slightly more sophisticated trampy girls trying to live every aspect of their lives as if they were Scarecrow Jessica Parker.

The benefit is (for my eyes), they are not as haggard as their TV versions. They are much younger/beautiful (hell, even the cougars are better looking than those worn-out HBO has beens)…

Chew on that reality.
Comment by Brittany

June 9th, 2008 at 3:23 pm

I love this.
SATC is the most ridiculous over popularized show on television. its sad that people enjoy this crap. Really, do something productive, go to an art museum. Culture yourself in something other than shit.
Comment by Alexia Tate

June 9th, 2008 at 3:59 pm

Thank you for posting a picture of Nadja Auermann in that great “stilettos=crippling injury” spread from Harper’s Bazaar back in the day. I still have the pages of this spread in my cache of fashion photos from the early 90s. Your article could have been a bit better written (really, the vocabulary is dull and lifeless), and even admitting that you were in SoHo on a weekend casts doubt on your actual hipness, but reintroducing Nadja to the masses is a worthwhile endeavor in and of itself.
Comment by Lori

June 9th, 2008 at 5:24 pm

I wish men would shut up about SATC.

Women watched it for the female issues and female conversations . . . like the episode where Miranda asks . . . “What is it with men and skid marks?!”

It was never about the shoes.
Comment by Justin

June 9th, 2008 at 5:59 pm

looks like Cody has angered some girls that like to play dress up and live someone else’s life.
Comment by Jill

June 9th, 2008 at 6:09 pm

OK, first of all, high heels do not give you back problems or foot problems if they fit you correctly. Secondly, I have to agree with Mr. Willard, too many women try to be these characters and mirror them instead of just being themselves. Everywhere you look all you see is cookie cutter women. They all dress the same and do their hair the same and do their makeup the same (& some of them look absolutely awful). I was completely disgusted with this movie b/c instead of celebrating being the independent single girl like the show did, it became a run of the mill I-have-to-get-married-to-be-happy crap. Like marriage is some sort of fix-all. Was I the only one disgusted over this??
Comment by mark

June 9th, 2008 at 9:46 pm

Looking at your pic, I wonder which trendy style or star you yourself follow. There is nothing worse than a man trying to be a critic of trends, yet at even first glance, seems to be tripping over them himself. I have to say I agree with previous comments; you should be more concerned with your writing style or lack there of, because going broke because you are a writer who can’nt write….well you can’t get disability checks for that either!!!!
Comment by Al

June 9th, 2008 at 10:37 pm

You think if people really cared about this they’d take all these Carrie Bradshaw wannabee’s off of Fox News
Comment by Lori

June 9th, 2008 at 10:49 pm

Justin,

Looks like you men are threatened over a little TV show. Plus, as men, you don’t have a clue why women watched the show if you think it’s about high heels.

Women were wearing the high heels to the movie as a fun night out. As I said before, the popularity of the show for women was never about the clothes or shoes. It was about what the women talked about and what they thought about whatever was going on in their lives.

You guys can emulate your stupid sports heros and stupid male celebrities and no one says a word.
Comment by CJ

June 10th, 2008 at 1:09 am

Cody…please…

I worked at a movie theater as a teenager when the Star Wars movies came back in the 90s. There were groups of grown men standing at the theater doors at midnight wearing full Star Wars regalia, face paint and singing! So do me a favor- please leave our cosmos, Manolos, and four fabulous friends alone. We don’t pretend to understand your fixation with Indiana Jones, Superman, Spider Man, X-Men, Iron Man, Batman, Star Wars, Star Trek and other male-dominated-movies-that-seem-ridiculous-to-us-but-we-don’t-complain-about-them so please don’t pretend or even begin to understand Sex & the City, your head will explode. You say it’s unrealistic, yeah, well, so was the Sopranos but you guys still seemed to loved it.

Also, you’ve got it alllll wrong. The shows success is based on the fact that there ARE women out there just like these girls but moreso, women could RELATE to these women on some level. It was the first and only show that ever truly captured the complexity of women’s relationships, friendships, work/life balance without depicting them as helpless victims(i.e. Lifetime television), a trophy on some man’s arm, or eternally 20 yrs old. It was the first time the spotlight shined on women older than 35! Wait, I lied, there was the GOLDEN GIRLS. This put single, independent, 30-40-something women front and center - right where they belong. This obviously makes you and other men feel very threatened.

Check your statistics- women are getting married later, and some not at all and choose to co-habitate instead. Women aren’t having as many children as they used to and I can’t tell you a single woman who doesn’t work full time on top of it all. Do you realize women can vote these days? Were you the one with the sign behind Hillary Clinton yelling, “Iron My Shirt?”

There, I feel better.
Comment by Justin

June 10th, 2008 at 10:42 am

Lori,

Trashy TV is trashy TV period. I don’t care if it’s Sex and the City or the Man Show. It’s women like Carrie Bradshaw that have ruined any sort of courtship/romance in our society. When I see her, I see a lost empty person searching for a sense of worth by shopping for the latest fashion icons and constantly seeking the attention of the opposite sex. It’s pityful. It’s shallow. It’s pathetic the believe your self worth is determined by how many guys you can lure into a fling. It’s cowardly to not put yourself out there and play the emotions of other people in order to not get hurt.
Comment by Lily

June 10th, 2008 at 12:23 pm

After losing 75lbs, I reveled in finally being able to wear lots of cute high heels. I don’t wear them because of a TV show (which I do enjoy watching), but because they make me feel good. Now, after much fashion-peer-presure, I find myself buying ballet flats (which make me feel slouchy and lazy). Am I a fashion victum, YES. Does it have anything to do with TV, NO. If you think that women are shallow, that’s one thing, but to say that they are so mindless that they are basing their lives and their choices on Sex and the City, that’s another. Fantasy is fantasy. It allows us an escape from groceries, paying the bills, and doing the laundry. If performing those errands in 4-inch stilletos can make a girl feel a little less ordinary, more power to her. No different than the guy who wears his basketball jersey and shoots free throws of dirty socks into the washer.
Comment by cathy

June 10th, 2008 at 1:40 pm

Get a haircut dude. It’s not the year 1992.
Comment by Perry

June 10th, 2008 at 3:57 pm

Correct Cody, some people live a fantasy, really hard for then to go outside, meet someone and have a real conversation.
Comment by Cody Willard

June 10th, 2008 at 11:29 pm

Pretty great debate for the most part. Thanks to all of you for the back and forth and provocative discussion.

One main thought regarding these people calling me a caveman for my viewpoint: Were I drooling over these women, then wouldn’t I be a caveman? Damned if I do, damned if I don’t, it seems. Anyway ad hominem attacks can’t break my bones for a 26th time in my life.
Comment by D.O.D

June 13th, 2008 at 11:14 am

The reason why men hate the show is because all of the women on it are busted! Not a hot one in the bunch, from the horse face to the over the hill sex kitten, who wants to watch a bunch of unattractive women sit around and bitch about men and their short comings.

I think the show is a microcosm for what is wrong with “some” women in new york.
They have unrealistic goals and fantasies about relationships and men in general.
Simply put, looks, power and money seem to be the most important qualities.
Who can provide me with the biggest closet for my shoe collection? Good grief!

Read a book, watch Entourage!

I know Im a neanderthal….
Comment by Keri

June 17th, 2008 at 6:51 pm

I think you should find something better to talk about. No, scratch that. You’re a terrible thinker and writer and should be so lucky if anyone cared as much about your backwashed blabbering as they did about your antithesis, Carrie Bradshaw. Shut up about stilletos and get a job at a place that doesn’t suck.